Stop 'protecting your peace' and make time for your friends, writes Herald columnist Marissa MacWhirter. Why is everyone talking about how 'inconvenience is the cost of community'?

At this time of year, when the nights are long, windy, and damp, there are evenings when the thought of leaving my flat makes me feel ill. Especially after a demanding week of work, when it’s finally dark early enough to get the projector on before dinnertime (I finally subscribed to a streaming platform with every episode of The Real Housewives). Once the duvet is dragged from the bed to the sofa, it’s game over.

But as I sit, scrolling mindlessly through the bowels of social media in an attempt to keep the loneliness at bay, I continue to come across this phrase: “Inconvenience is the cost of community”. Once I see it, it’s everywhere: snappy videos, magazine features, sassy posts on X.

There has been a rampant glamourisation of making time for yourself, spending the weekend jogging, cleaning, and watching Netflix. A friend asked you to spend a Saturday helping them move flat? How dare they? Another wants to go for a coffee during your Pilates class? No chance.

Friends and I often joke about the joy of a cancelled plan, the relief when something falls through at the last minute, and you get to curl up at home, protecting your peace. But what does ‘protecting your peace’ really mean? It’s essentially just a well-worded excuse to avoid doing anything that might cause the slightest discomfort.

The hard truth is that we cannot complain about........

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