Are you using ‘authenticity’ as an excuse not to grow? Here are some signs that you are

You shouldn’t use authenticity to resist development.

[Source Illustration: Freepik]

BY Chantal Laurie Below

Authenticity is a critical leadership trait. Research shows that it facilitates more trusting relationships and a more positive working environment. Often, though, in my executive coaching practice, I hear senior leaders use ‘authenticity’ as a covert excuse to resist development.

When clients say, “That doesn’t feel authentic,” it’s often a signal they’re avoiding growth. They’re fearfully or righteously attached to a static version of their leadership. This is a major liability. As leaders elevate in seniority, they must adapt their approach. They need to experiment with different ways of thinking, communicating, and engaging to navigate increased scope and complexity.

Take my client Meg, a brilliant Head of Design. Meg thrives on collaborating to determine feasible next steps on a project. And yet, colleagues say, “She’s so talented, I want her to be more visible.” “She’s got amazing ideas; she should be bolder with them.” Co-workers don’t want her to lead from behind and provide measured solutions. Meg’s convinced, however, that these changes would feel inauthentic and resists change.

Here are three warning signs that leaders, like Meg, are using authenticity to limit their growth.

Using extreme labels to reject feedback

Often, when leaders get so attached to their “authentic style,” they default to off-putting words when they describe the change that people ask them to make. The direct leader sees the call to operate diplomatically as passive-aggressive. The earnest leader sees encouragement to “strategically influence” as an ask to manipulate. The empathetic leader sees feedback around leading with more logic and data as heartless. Because these traits are undesirable, leaders feel justified in remaining stagnant. They are blind to the reality that diplomacy signals leadership maturity, logic builds clarity, and influencing facilitates progress.

Instead of relying on the harshest descriptors of a change being asked of them, leaders are better served by choosing words that invite growth.

Take Meg. Colleagues asked her to be more visible and bold. But she insisted to me, “Steamrolling people with brazen ideas isn’t how I want to lead.” This interpretation made Meg defend her “authentic” identity. Together we explored how she could be visible without steamrolling and bold but not brazen. Meg saw she could unabashedly highlight the successes of her team to bolster design’s cross-functional credibility and amplify her keen imagination by repeatedly asking herself, “How might it be bigger?” before she landed on ideas.

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