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Simon Kelner

Simon Kelner

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Why I will mourn the absurd British tradition that ends forever in three weeks

Why I will mourn the absurd British tradition that ends forever in three weeks

When a democratic tradition that has lasted for 800 years is brought to an end, you expect something of a fanfare, or at least an acknowledgement. But...

previous day 10

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Simon Kelner

The death of Gentleman's Relish proves that Britain has lost its taste

My dear friend the Colonel and I have tea together from time to time at one of the country’s most august establishments. He’s not really a...

09.04.2026 10

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Simon Kelner

If you think Trump can no longer shock you, read his crudest rant

Donald Trump picked up his phone, flexed his trigger finger, and in response to a highly sensitive situation that will affect thousands of people’s...

06.04.2026 10

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Simon Kelner

I feel guilty about how obviously rigged the housing market is for boomers

The comedian George Carlin was unforgiving in his disdain for people like me: “The Baby Boomers,” he said, “[are] whiny, narcissistic,...

30.03.2026 10

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Simon Kelner

It's hard to believe, but the NHS may be the thing that saves Starmer

No one will, or should, put out the bunting to greet the news that public satisfaction with the NHS has risen for the first time since 2019. It’s a...

25.03.2026 20

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Simon Kelner

No one wants to say it, but I pity Fergie

You will be disappointed to learn that applications to become a Freeman (or woman, presumably) of the City of York are now closed, according to the...

19.03.2026 20

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Simon Kelner

I refuse to burden my daughter in old age - I've already left her with problems

Caring for parents as they age is more of a moral issue in the UK than a legal one. In some places, such as certain American states and countries like...

19.03.2026 20

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Simon Kelner

Only one man in No 10 seems to have any integrity left

In his bestselling and influential turn-of-the-millennium book The Tipping Point, journalist and author Malcolm Gladwell explores what it is that...

12.03.2026 20

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Simon Kelner

Trump is the bad workman blaming his tools

So there we are at this week’s summit of leaders from the continents of North and South America and one of the statesmen present is on the podium,...

11.03.2026 30

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Simon Kelner

If you want to understand why Britain is broken, just look down

In the manifesto which presaged the landslide election of this Labour Government, there was a very specific pledge. It wasn’t an abstract promise...

03.03.2026 10

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Simon Kelner

Epstein is burning reputations - and King Charles is not immune

If you care to visit the Epstein Library and put Prince Charles – as he then was – into its search engine, you will find 61 entries under the name...

26.02.2026 10

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Simon Kelner

Splitting bills 50/50 with your partner? Good luck making your relationship last

26.02.2026 10

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Simon Kelner

Fergie's business failures reveal her shameless desperation for cash

When it comes to the Epstein papers, the devil is in the detail. Sometimes literally. And so, among the hundreds of thousands of emails tossed into...

17.02.2026 20

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Simon Kelner

Monaco man Jim Ratcliffe seems to know a lot about Britain's failings

12.02.2026 10

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Simon Kelner

Trump's chaotic rage at the Super Bowl shows he's losing his grip

09.02.2026 8

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Simon Kelner

Peter Mandelson came to my wedding - and then tried to have me sacked

05.02.2026 10

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Simon Kelner

Thin-skinned Trump's threats reveal the weakness he has lived with his whole life

03.02.2026 10

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Simon Kelner

There's one dog breed that proves you are a better person

30.01.2026 10

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Simon Kelner

Pick-up trucks don't belong in Britain

27.01.2026 10

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Simon Kelner

We've become habitually rude – and I know exactly who is to blame

23.01.2026 10

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Simon Kelner

I quietly agree with Trump on one thing

14.01.2026 10

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Simon Kelner

Can Jews be antisemitic? I've been forced to address this uncomfortable question

13.01.2026 10

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Simon Kelner

You didn't really think weight loss jabs would fix everything, surely?

08.01.2026 10

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Simon Kelner

Dogs outnumber children in some areas - it's a warning to us all

06.01.2026 10

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Simon Kelner

The latest Andrew photo embodies our worst fears about the Royal Family

24.12.2025 7

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Simon Kelner

At 67, a 10-minute surgery transformed my life - I'm never looking back

02.12.2025 10

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Simon Kelner

Trump is bullying the BBC – and we’re letting him

12.11.2025 10

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Simon Kelner

Andrew should lose every privilege, but taking his Falklands medal is too much 

03.11.2025 20

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Simon Kelner

The Word of 2025 couldn't make me feel less cool or excluded. But that's the point

31.10.2025 10

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Simon Kelner

Ignore Wes Streeting's doom mongering about Britain

28.10.2025 10

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Simon Kelner

Piers Morgan's 13 life lessons are worth following – no, really

20.10.2025 10

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Simon Kelner

Gary Neville is right - the flags in our towns represent something sinister

06.10.2025 10

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Simon Kelner

I’ve never worried that people hate me because I'm Jewish - that's changed

03.10.2025 10

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Simon Kelner

All Brits should be made to take the good citizen test

29.09.2025 20

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Simon Kelner

My friend John Stapleton taught me to be a better person

23.09.2025 9

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Simon Kelner

The real reason Angela Rayner is met with scorn? She's northern

02.09.2025 10

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Simon Kelner

Finally, we have proof that nice people don't finish last

26.08.2025 20

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Simon Kelner

Why men like Leonardo DiCaprio and I behave like we are decades younger

18.08.2025 10

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Simon Kelner

Where is the anger over the outrageous arrests at Palestine Action protests?

15.08.2025 20

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Simon Kelner

I work from home but still think young people should be in the office

12.08.2025 10

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Simon Kelner

The Naked Gun isn't high art - but we loved it for one specific reason

07.08.2025 10

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Simon Kelner

Noel Gallagher is right: we owe everything to Manchester

05.08.2025 10

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Simon Kelner

King Charles is quite right to be fussy about his garden

21.07.2025 10

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Simon Kelner

The only reason I've survived the male friendship recession: golf

18.07.2025 10

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Simon Kelner

The BBC is a master of responding to its own mistakes

16.07.2025 10

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Simon Kelner

I love dogs - but there is no place for them in restaurants

11.07.2025 10

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Simon Kelner

Another fine mess at Wimbledon

07.07.2025 9

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Simon Kelner

I have just got back from France – the heat is making holidays in Europe impossible

04.07.2025 10

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Simon Kelner

Peta has gone too far with its royal stunt – and lost my support

27.06.2025 10

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Simon Kelner

Mounjaro is the epitome of our quick-fix culture - and it's here to stay

24.06.2025 10

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Simon Kelner