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Why ‘Queening’ Is the Sex Act Women Keep Coming Back To, According to Experts

Experts say queening puts women’s pleasure and control at the center, but communication and safety still matter.

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Queening has been around since ancient Rome, appeared in the Kama Sutra, was depicted in 19th-century French paintings, and has been a fixture of BDSM communities for decades. It’s having a moment right now, and it’s hard to argue with the reasoning.

Also called facesitting, queening involves a woman sitting over her partner’s face for oral stimulation, with her in control of pace, pressure, and positioning. According to sex therapist Dr. Kate Balestrieri, the appeal for women lies largely in agency. “For women, queer folks, and others in marginalized bodies, assuming physical and psychological dominance can challenge societal narratives, which may otherwise stigmatize them for seeking out pleasure or asserting their presence,” she writes at Modern Intimacy. The........

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