This is not normal. This never has been, and it never will be. Make it stop.

We heard about the shooting before Florida State University's emergency alert texts started coming in. We turned off the lights and barricaded the door with our desks. We tied belts around the door hinge. We took the flag off the wall and used it to cover the window.

Growing up in Tallahassee, I was taught what to do during a hurricane, during a tornado and during a shooting. I’ve had school days canceled by storms and school days canceled by bomb threats. I’ve been in lockdowns before.

On April 17, I focused on numbers. Six closest to the barricade. Me. The professor. Four boys. One metal water bottle in each of our hands, six total.

If anyone did manage to get through the barricade, we wanted to be ready. I guessed about 25 more people were up against the walls of the room. I didn’t know who had shown up and who hadn’t. We ended up doing a headcount: 34 total.

I was routinely texting and calling my dad. I’m forever grateful for him. He’s a first responder and gave me as much information as he could. I was relaying what I knew to my classmates because I hoped that if we all knew as much as possible, it might just make things a little bit easier. At one point, I handed the phone to my professor so my dad........

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