In 2012, Shay Leighton hit a low point. On the outside he ticked all the boxes, a successful job and engaged regularly with his work peers. Underneath he was miserable.

“I was a workaholic and talked to the same people daily. I lived for my job, but I was unhappy,” he says. Slowly, he began to realise all his conversations were about work. So he decided to stop work talk.

Shay Leighton (front right) at a Tough Guy book club meeting at Goldy’s Tavern in the inner-Melbourne suburb of Collingwood.Credit: Joe Armao

“When I stopped, I realised I hadn’t had a decent conversation in years. I’ve come to understand that men feel they have to achieve, win or be useful for a purpose. That leads to being job-focused.”

To move from work talk, Leighton started the Tough Guy book club. One hardened rule of the club was to never discuss work. This rule produced some remarkable changes.

“Typically, men start a conversation around, what do you do for work? Take that away and deeper questions surface. All of a sudden, the members had to........

© The Sydney Morning Herald