Theo Von Goes On Rant, Proves Celebrities Don’t Know What The Hell They’re Talking About

(Photo by Dia Dipasupil/Getty Images)

Comedian Theo Von aired out some grievances Thursday in his appearance on “The Joe Rogan Experience.”

“I’m sick of this shit. And I’m sick of rich people not putting their fucking kids over in these wars and shit like that. Put your fucking honky ass kids up there, let them go shed some fucking blood,” Von said.

“Especially if you’re asking for it,” Joe Rogan added.

“Especially if you’re out there fucking bullshitting dude, put your fucking little, honky ass, fancy ass fucking kid up there, man. Shit makes me mad, bro,” Von continued. (RELATED: Theo Von’s Netflix Flop Sparks Relapse Rumors) 

Von’s talking points are about sixty years out of date. The federal government last employed the draft during the Vietnam War.

As it stands, we have a volunteer military, and the majority of that volunteer military are “honkies.” (In fact, the U.S. military has always been majority-honky.)

‘I’M SICK OF RICH PEOPLE NOT PUTTING THEIR F*CKING KIDS OVER IN THESE WARS’ — Theo Von to Joe Rogan ‘PUT YOUR F*CKING HONKY ASS KIDS UP THERE. LET THEM GO SHED SOME F*CKING BLOOD’ ‘Put your f*cking honky little fancy ass f*cking kid up there’ pic.twitter.com/XjxNOCrpKi — RT (@RT_com) April 2, 2026

‘I’M SICK OF RICH PEOPLE NOT PUTTING THEIR F*CKING KIDS OVER IN THESE WARS’ — Theo Von to Joe Rogan

‘PUT YOUR F*CKING HONKY ASS KIDS UP THERE. LET THEM GO SHED SOME F*CKING BLOOD’

‘Put your f*cking honky little fancy ass f*cking kid up there’ pic.twitter.com/XjxNOCrpKi

— RT (@RT_com) April 2, 2026

The U.S. military had about 2.81 million service members worldwide in 2025, according to USAFacts. Of that 2.81 million, about 1.33 million were active-duty service members.

All military branches are majority white. The Navy is the least white (62.2%) and the Marine Corps is the most white (79.6%). The army is about 66.2% white. 

By any metric, whites are overrepresented in every branch of the military. About 56.3% of the U.S. population identifies as “non-hispanic white alone,” according to data from the 2024 U.S. Census. (The number of white Americans jumps to 72.1% if you lump in white alone with those who identify as white and one or more other racial groups.)

But whites are more overrepresented than it appears at first glance. 

Among Americans aged 18 to 24, about 50.5% identify as solely white. Approximately 68.8% of active-duty military personnel identify as white, according to the U.S. Naval Institute’s news service. Given that active duty personnel tend to skew younger, whites are vastly overrepresented on the front lines. 

White men made up 80% of active duty military deaths in the Korean War, according to a Congressional Research Service Report. White men made up 85.6% of active duty military deaths in the Vietnam War. White men and white women accounted for about 78.2% of active duty military deaths in the Persian Gulf War. 

Boomer pop cultural hegemony remains undefeated in the United States. Almost six decades after the Summer of Love, and people are STILL doing “Fortunate Son” tirades, though far more inarticulately and with less basis in reality. https://t.co/NndQ8ncrHv — T. Becket Adams (@BecketAdams) April 3, 2026

Boomer pop cultural hegemony remains undefeated in the United States.

Almost six decades after the Summer of Love, and people are STILL doing “Fortunate Son” tirades, though far more inarticulately and with less basis in reality. https://t.co/NndQ8ncrHv

— T. Becket Adams (@BecketAdams) April 3, 2026

“I meant the elites and politicians that are leading us into these wars might make different choices if it was their children. It was hard for me to be angry and talk at the same time. I am thankful for to our troops who serve and are far braver than me. And also wtf do i know,” Von wrote on X, following his appearance on Rogan’s podcast. 

This is a bad litmus test for whether a war is just or sensible or strategically advantageous. British aristocrats famously sent their sons into the military to become army officers (particularly younger sons who didn’t stand to inherit the family estate). 

Or, for a modern example: Bill Kristol’s son, Joseph Max Kristol, served as a U.S. Marine Corps infantry officer between 2009 and 2013. He served in Afghanistan from September 2010 to April 2011, according to the New York Times (NYT). (RELATED: ‘Never Trumper’ Bill Kristol Shows One Of Most Embarrassing Examples Of Trump Derangement Syndrome Yet) 

Bill Kristol, of course, was a leading proponent of the 2003 Iraq War.

Follow Natalie Sandoval on X: @NatSandovalDC

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