Party like it’s the end of the world? No thanks, I’d much rather do this instead

April 1, 2026 — 3:00pm

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Has staying in become the new going out? When I reminded my partner that we had a dinner date with friends, he was appalled. “Oh no, we can’t go out tonight. I mean, we just went out recently … in January.”

Disappointed, I then tried to extract a promise that he’d attend a mate’s 70th in Byron Bay. But he gave another theatrical shake of his head.

“Out of range of your parole ankle bracelet, is it?” I wisecracked through thinning lips.

When I complained that he’d become antisocial, he gestured to the rain sluicing down the window pane, patted the couch beside him and flicked on a new crime series.

I thought about the night ahead, making small talk at a dinner party with pretentious posers. These particular artsy pals tend to invite people who have nothing to say … and spend all night saying it. At their last soirée, I sat........

© The Age