Compulsive liars are different from fraudsters and con men because their lying is out of control.

Compulsive liars accept their sense of guilt because they value the admiration elicited by their lies.

The urge to impress others can outweigh the fear of having lies exposed.

The story behind any expose of a compulsive liar involves human suffering and, until we understand more fully the psychology of compulsive lying, the story is likely to turn into tragedy.

Mixed Feelings About Admiration

The discovery that our admiration has been misplaced and manipulated can be exhausting. Admiration is usually a positive feeling, but it uses up energy. It stirs thoughts about possibilities for others and for ourselves. It reorganizes the mental map of our own challenges and achievements relative to others. We can genuinely enjoy our admiration of others while also feeling burdened by the task of managing our relative sense of worth.

So, alongside the puzzle as to how a compulsive liar can feel OK about lying to friends and colleagues is the frisson we may feel when their lies are exposed. This mean pleasure arises from anger at being duped. Being "taken in" by someone is disorienting. We feel vulnerable, even targeted for our trust. The anger arises from our increased awareness of vulnerability to being hoodwinked. Relishing their public exposure reassures us of shared standards and values.

The Fascination With an Exposed Liar

Someone who commands admiration for amazing feats of excellence—athletic, academic,........

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