There was a time when friendships seemed to come naturally. Growing up, schooling provided abundant opportunities to meet like-minded people and engage in shared activities. But, as we age, a lot of those friendships dissolve. People become busy with their own journey—finding love, switching careers, moving countries, or even growing into different people. In the midst of these changes, it’s easy to lose contact.

That doesn’t, however, diminish the value of having great friends in our lives. If anything, it makes it all the more urgent. Many people report feeling unexpectedly lonely in their adult years and yearn for the supportive social circle that once came so easily.

Here’s why making friends as an adult feels so lonely, and how to turn it around.

It’s natural to think others will approach you simply due to the proximity between you, whether it’s at work, the gym, or any other social setting. Many people experience fewer reservations in approaching others when they’re younger, but as adults, they tend to be more guarded.

This is where spontaneity can make all the difference. Simply having an intention to reach out to people you think will get along with you pushes you on the path to creating great friendships. In fact, casual conversations with a random stranger or acquaintances create innumerable positive mental health outcomes.

As Taylor West, lead author of a 2024 study that tested a new micro-intervention to improve the quality of everyday interactions with........

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