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When the Pursuit of Success Becomes Self-Defeating

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All of us engage in self-defeating behaviors periodically. We overeat, we stay up later than we should, and date people solely based on external factors, like appearance. But for some of us, our personalities are structured in such a way that being self-defeating is a way of life.

Most perfectionists — whether they’re success-oriented and chronically sacrificing for glory, or morally-focused and chronically sacrificing their needs for others, or both — organize their lives in a manner that, when considered through a long-term perspective, can be described as self-defeating. Sacrifice, even in the long term, isn’t necessarily negative. We can equate its long-term form with discipline and conscientiousness, terms which describe perfectionists. However, long-term sacrifice transitions into its self-defeating form when several things occur:

1. The negative outcomes significantly outweigh the positive ones in the long run.

2. One's ultimate goal is either unattainable or based on a

© Psychology Today