Cougars. The term is finally taking on a whole new meaning. Traditionally, it’s been used derogatorily to label older women who date younger men as predatory. But now, there’s a reclamation happening, and you only need to look at TikTok to see it.

There are currently over 113,000 videos under the hashtag #CougarTok, and more than twice that number under #cougar. The videos aren’t just thirst traps or jokes; they’re sparking conversations about age-gap relationships that feel fresh, confident and celebratory.

Pop culture is mirroring this shift, too. From Anne Hathaway in ”The Idea of You” to the latest ”Bridget Jones” instalment, to Nicole Kidman in ”Babygirl” and ”A Family Affair,” being the older woman is now being considered sexy as hell, and being embraced as desirable, empowered and in control.

May-December relationships are becoming less taboo — particularly among women looking for the more "casual" experience of dating younger men.

What used to feel taboo, reminiscent of the Mrs. Robinson stereotype, is now far more accepted. In fact, it may even be more socially embraced than the traditional May-December pairing of older men with younger women. Just look at the backlash Leonardo DiCaprio has faced in recent years.

This isn’t just a passing trend ― it marks a real shift in how women are choosing partners and how younger men perceive them. Society is finally catching up to the idea that an older woman dating a younger man can be exciting, balanced and completely normal.

Research backs this as well. A 2023 study done by social psychologist Justin J. Lehmiller, a research fellow at the Kinsey Institute, shows that despite lingering stigma, older women with younger male partners report the highest levels of relationship satisfaction and commitment compared to women in age-similar or younger-partner relationships. In Lehmiller’s survey of roughly 200 heterosexual women, those more than 10 years older than their male partners were, on average, thriving. One possible reason: These relationships often foster a more equal power dynamic ― a factor consistently linked to greater relationship happiness.

Sex therapist Chelsea Newton said she’s seen age-gap relationships, especially between older women and younger men, “unfold in ways that are far more layered than the ‘cougar’ stereotype ever allowed.”

“What I notice clinically,” Newton said, “is that these relationships often thrive not because they break rules, but because they sidestep some of the most limiting ones.”

Older women, she said, often bring “a clarity........

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