'Our 59-year-old friend revamped her look...but not for the better'

Our 59-year-old friend announced she was tired of her dated look and needed a revamp ahead of her big birthday, and revamp she did ... but not for the better.

We almost spat out our Chardonnay when she walked into the pub with cropped purple hair, a skirt up her backside, and a top so tight nothing was left to the imagination.

As I’m the mouthy one, everyone looked at me to tell her what we were all thinking, but she was so happy that I cowardly grinned and said nothing.

We don’t want her to be a laughingstock, so what do we do?

It’s common for women in their late fifties to feel invisible, so they compensate with a makeover which often misses the mark.

But hitting 60, she should aim for sophistication instead of seduction.

She needs to ditch the cheap polyester revealing tops and choose a higher neckline, bin the pelmet skirts for knee or mid-length ones, and choose looser clothing which is often more flattering at her age.

Make-up should be subtle and not drawn on, with natural hair colours, even grey.

But how do you tell her?

Firstly, focus on praise.

Perhaps compliment her on her amazing skin, fabulous legs, or mention that she has a figure to die for, and you don’t think she is enhancing her best qualities with the outfits and style she has chosen.

She has gone off track and needs her friends' support, but don’t get into this as a group, or she could feel attacked.

Offer to look together at styles and fashion of icons like Jennifer Aniston, Susan Sarandon, or Twiggy, who have an understated style but still look amazing.

Just you and her scrolling Instagram and flicking through magazines for ideas you can both mirror and take it from there.

Perhaps when she recognises the contrast between herself and these glamourous women the penny will drop.

I’m worried about my sister.

She is always down, moody, lethargic, and sleeps a lot.

I only get one-word answers and don’t know how to help her move on from this?

It’s great that you recognise she is not herself.

The first stop is a visit to her GP, but in the meantime, to help you help her, contact Breathing Space on 0800 83 85 87 (calls are free), or check out breathingspace.scot to discover ways they can help you in a situation where you believe someone close could be suffering from depression.

Getting help at an early stage can stop problems escalating and offer hope when none exists.

Joyce, the most important thing at this stage is to listen, offer to make her a GP appointment, and encourage her to get outdoors for walks or outings.

You’ve taken a positive first step in sharing your concerns about your sister, so hang on in there for as long as she needs you.

Got a question for our agony aunt?

Email askjanice@glasgowtimes.co.uk

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