By late in the day on Oct. 7, 2023, I already felt the world begin to crack down the middle and people scramble frantically to one side or another to stake their positions.  

Within moments, it seemed, freedom of speech and its ugly twin, hate speech, were hauled out to justify the vile insults and threats against Jews, as well as the firings, cancellations, arrests and deportations of Muslim and other supporters of a free Palestine. As the expected horror in Gaza unfolded, academic and arts institutions—often under unexamined pressure to pick sides—began falling into line. I watched as Jews became a stand-in for a flag; watched them get ignored, rejected, disinvited or forced out of events. The old familiar role of scapegoat.

Organizations position these decisions and non-decisions as taking a principled stand and not being wishy-washy. I see them as knee-jerk, un-nuanced, bandwagon choices that rarely end well. Not only because I’m one of those Jews.

My debut novel, White, was published in October 2024. It’s about a young woman who grows up in a white supremacist family in Southern Ontario, rejects those beliefs, and attempts to take down the movement from within, with dire consequences. It was turned down by five literary festivals and a lot of media. 

One rejection letter explained the decision as a “tricky balance between celebrating bold work and creating a space that feels comfortable for a broad audience.” Nazis and trauma were mentioned as areas of potential discomfort. That rang false to me. Not the discomfort part, that’s precisely the right word. What I don’t buy is that the problem is Nazis and trauma. Many are eager to talk about these things. And literature should make us feel uncomfortable.

It’s possible I’m looking for excuses to justify my exclusion. Maybe it’s a case of low priority—boohoo, cry me a river for a poor ex-white supremacist girl and her ‘issues.’ But the rejections— gentle and flattering—contain words like timely and important, alongside “a bit too heavy.” 

I suspect the discomfort........

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