Recently, I was coaching one of my students through a common problem: the resistance and inertia to working on her finances, and doing the things she knows she “should” be doing.

The most common solution people try is some kind of brute force. They think they must be lazy, and need to force themselves, have better discipline or willpower.

Burying your head in the sand, or trying to force yourself to get better, won’t help you fix your financial woes.Credit: Simon Letch

That might yield short-term results but it rarely lasts. Quickly, that steam runs out, and they return to their previous patterns of avoidance until eventually, they muster the energy – hoping that this time it will last.

What’s a better solution? Let’s start by looking at why people resort to such behaviour.

If you’re avoiding your finances, it’s likely there is some negative emotion attached. Maybe you’re scared to look at it, ashamed of past mistakes or you grew up in a household with a lot of financial conflict, so you associate money with conflict and stress.

Research shows that emotions such as........

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