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Emma Beddington

Emma Beddington

The Guardian

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Winter is coming – and so is my 50th birthday. It’s time to eat all the pastries and grab all the joy

Support for seasonal self-love comes from an unexpected quarter: the French daily Libération has issued a plea for us to embrace our “winter...

monday 20

The Guardian

Emma Beddington

If reason can’t save the world, no wonder magic and superstition are on the rise

How good must it feel to gather up physical manifestations of your anxieties, shove them in a giant papier-mache demon and set fire to them?...

17.11.2024 30

The Guardian

Emma Beddington

I’ve gained a whole new insight into my personality – from a cat psychiatrist

The only time I have ever mentioned my bird-lover’s slight – slight! – ambivalence towards cats in a public forum, it brought me the angriest...

11.11.2024 10

The Guardian

Emma Beddington

Tom Hanks reckons 35 is the worst age. This is why he’s wrong

If you’re 34, watch out: Tom Hanks says 35 is the worst age. Why ask Hanks – delightful as he seems – as opposed to, say, the highly qualified...

10.11.2024 20

The Guardian

Emma Beddington

Is the British obsession with class starting to wane?

Rejoice: British class distinctions are finally crumbling. Yes, the gap between rich and poor is as big as ever and I am, inexplicably, unhappily,...

04.11.2024 10

The Guardian

Emma Beddington

Welcome to the new era of midlife lust! I need a lie down …

Are middle-aged women absolute horndogs and does that make for good box office? That’s what Grazia wondered recently, asking if the film industry is...

03.11.2024 10

The Guardian

Emma Beddington

If my Netflix recommendations are anything to go by, I am tragically basic

A single female friend is feeling uncomfortably targeted by Netflix. The content categories the streamer is now offering on her homepage include...

28.10.2024 10

The Guardian

Emma Beddington

Want to understand British irony, humour and politics? Visit the NHS suggestions website

Do you ever wonder if the British might be a fundamentally unserious people? I do, though I should stress that I include myself; a thoroughly trivial...

27.10.2024 20

The Guardian

Emma Beddington

Bad buffet behaviour is out of control. So should we be fined for our food waste?

Should you be penalised for having eyes bigger than your belly? A Cornish pub is trying it out: Mark Graham, the landlord of the Star Inn, now charges...

21.10.2024 20

The Guardian

Emma Beddington

Welcome to the ‘winter arc’ – the very worst season in the self-improvement calendar

Ah, autumn. Season of mists, mellow fruitfulness, chunky knits, pumpkin spice lattes and cosiness, right? Wrong. In the words of an intense young man...

20.10.2024 20

The Guardian

Emma Beddington

What’s in my handbag? 76.75 loose and potentially dangerous items

The kingdom was shaken by another shattering royal revelation last week when Lord West revealed that when he was briefly given custody of the queen...

14.10.2024 30

The Guardian

Emma Beddington

Good news, everyone! We appear to have reached peak longevity

The news hasn’t been good for people planning to live for ever. First came Dr Saul Newman’s investigative work into supercententarians – those...

13.10.2024 10

The Guardian

Emma Beddington

I was way out of my depth at the yoga workshop – but at least I wasn’t bleeding like my neighbour

Why on earth did I read about a five-week yoga forearm-stand workshop and think: “That sounds like a fun challenge – I should sign up”? I’m...

07.10.2024 20

The Guardian

Emma Beddington

I thought I was fine with being bald. But the chance of a cure has stirred up all sorts of feelings

My hair looks incredible at the moment. I know because people keep telling me – in bakeries, cafes and when I was getting my tattooed eyebrows...

06.10.2024 10

The Guardian

Emma Beddington

I took a common sense test – and my result appalled me

Common sense is not that common: a recent study from the University of Pennsylvania concludes the concept is “somewhat illusory”. Researchers...

30.09.2024 90

The Guardian

Emma Beddington

The Substance is gory – but the real body horror is that 70% of women dislike the size of their breasts

I was thinking about breasts as I watched The Substance. Coralie Fargeat’s body-horror fable features Demi Moore as a newly 50, supposedly fading...

29.09.2024 20

The Guardian

Emma Beddington

I thought I was laidback about my sons leaving home. My WhatsApps tell a different story

‘Texting your teenage son is like texting a guy who has no interest in you” goes a meme that has re-emerged recently, piercing in its accuracy....

23.09.2024 9

The Guardian

Emma Beddington

I decided to spend a day as a dog. It was completely idyllic, at first ...

You know how sometimes you think you’ve had a brilliant idea, then it bites you in the bum like an athletic but mean jack russell? Suggesting I...

22.09.2024 40

The Guardian

Emma Beddington

I worship Nigella Lawson. But I disagree with her – very strongly – about eating in bed

Possibly the least surprising revelation from the Times’s recent Nigella Lawson interview: she loves eating in bed. It’s so on-brand, it reminded...

16.09.2024 10

The Guardian

Emma Beddington

Parents are anxious, lonely, overwhelmingly stressed – and their crisis affects everyone

It is the kind of statistic that makes you do a double-take, because it can’t be right. It is, though: 41% of US parents are so stressed that they...

15.09.2024 40

The Guardian

Emma Beddington

All these health scares are making me ill. I need someone to tell me croissants are good for you

The recent headline that a “Daily croissant can take a toll on your heart in under a month” was like a dagger to mine, just as my beloved local...

09.09.2024 10

The Guardian

Emma Beddington

Just six years until my middle-aged ‘career decline’? But I’ve just got started!

At 49, I’ve just learned I’m in my “late career” era, according to a recent marketing graphic from the job search giant Indeed. That’s what...

08.09.2024 7

The Guardian

Emma Beddington

The kids are eating us out of house and home – and I couldn’t be happier

“How many of these cookies can I eat?” my older son texts (he is downstairs; I am up). “They’re really good.” My fingertips tingle with...

02.09.2024 20

The Guardian

Emma Beddington

Why bother going on holiday when you can watch other people’s on social media?

I haven’t been on holiday this summer, but don’t start tuning the tiny violins. I derive an unusual satisfaction from working when others aren’t...

01.09.2024 20

The Guardian

Emma Beddington

No brothers or sisters? That doesn’t mean you’ll grow up spoiled and lonely

Are only children selfish, spoiled and lonely? Duh, no, a piece in the New Scientist recently concluded, unpicking all these stereotypes. There are...

26.08.2024 30

The Guardian

Emma Beddington

I thought I was done with parenthood. But the tortoises had other plans

An unexpected thing has happened: I, we, have had a baby. A surprise change-of-life baby! That wasn’t part of our empty nest plan, but sometimes...

25.08.2024 30

The Guardian

Emma Beddington

An American came to stay – and completely changed my attitude to water

My son brought his girlfriend home last month and we really wanted to make things nice for her. We started with a shame-fuelled whirlwind clean, but...

19.08.2024 70

The Guardian

Emma Beddington

Birth changes women’s bodies for ever – and we need to get real about it

‘My biggest issue is that I don’t feel like I’m in my body,” Naomi Osaka wrote this week on Instagram. A year after her daughter was born, the...

18.08.2024 20

The Guardian

Emma Beddington

Melon madness has me in its grip. I blame the French

Scrolling through “what I eat in a week” diaries instead of working, I found one from the New York fashion designer Somsack Sikhounmuong, and was...

05.08.2024 10

The Guardian

Emma Beddington

Reuse that teabag! Ignore that special offer! It’s time to join the underconsumer revolution

‘I never want to own anything again,” messaged my son, packing up after a year abroad. He was experiencing the self-loathing rite of passage that...

04.08.2024 50

The Guardian

Emma Beddington

Summer trends, summer reads, summer colours … This insufferable season needs to wind its neck in

I read yet another roundup of summer trends last week with narrowed eyes and my traditional wasp-chewing expression of disapproval. We are supposed,...

29.07.2024 10

The Guardian

Emma Beddington

We were promised a 15-hour working week. What’s the hold-up?

In ancient Greece, Aristotle was big on “noble leisure”, but modern Greece might need a refresher, having just introduced a six-day, 48-hour...

28.07.2024 10

The Guardian

Emma Beddington

DIY smear tests are on their way? I’ll be first in the queue

DIY smear tests for women in England may be imminent, after a pilot scheme produced promising results. In London, 27,000 undertested or untested women...

22.07.2024 9

The Guardian

Emma Beddington

How should York deal with unruly tourists? I have a few suggestions for my hometown

‘Go steady, we’ve got enough history,” reads one of York’s new purple street signs. “Respect your bar staff and taxi drivers, give them...

21.07.2024 30

The Guardian

Emma Beddington

‘Look at my husband’s lovely cagoule!’ – should I become a hype partner like Travis Kelce?

Should we hype our partners? Elle magazine’s celebration of the “hype boyfriend” has me wondering. These cheerleaders for their other halves are...

15.07.2024 8

The Guardian

Emma Beddington

Raging, radical and ready for change: France’s angry green women are an inspiration to us all

‘I really like these angry green women,” a French friend said recently, as the assembly elections approached. It’s a funny phrase, redolent of...

14.07.2024 30

The Guardian

Emma Beddington

Do you struggle to accept rejection? We could all learn a lot from American cheerleaders

I expected to watch America’s Sweethearts, the Netflix documentary on the Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders (“DCC” to initiates) with horrified...

08.07.2024 8

The Guardian

Emma Beddington

We’ve reached peak tat. It’s time to turn all online shoppers like me into primeval ooze

My WhatsApp messages show that I spend a lot of time complaining about capitalism, probably because I want to sound deep and radical, like a Sally...

07.07.2024 20

The Guardian

Emma Beddington

We’re all familiar with BFFs and frenemies. Here are six other friendship types you need to know

The New York Times recently explored “the vexing problem of the ‘medium friend’”: people who aren’t your ride or die, but more than mere...

01.07.2024 30

The Guardian

Emma Beddington

I want to survive the apocalypse – but not if it’s just me and some terrible billionaires

I have just been to the Hebrides, because trudging across tussocks in the rain is my ancestrally transmitted idea of fun. The weather was fine,...

30.06.2024 20

The Guardian

Emma Beddington

Will my sons vote this year? I hope so – or Rishi will conscript them

Are elections like buses? For dual French-British citizens like me, we’ve had the European ones and now, in addition to the UK, the snap French...

24.06.2024 6

The Guardian

Emma Beddington

I am sober curious – but a little alcohol is still valuable to me

The sun is out, the football is on, beer gardens are packed and sunset-pink shots of condensation-frosted palomas (the new negroni) are plastered...

23.06.2024 10

The Guardian

Emma Beddington

Are all cats Tories? I considered the politics of my pets – and they’re not pretty

If you’re feeling over- or underwhelmed by the election (probably both), have you considered how your pets would vote? This perennial can of worms...

10.06.2024 20

The Guardian

Emma Beddington

Young women are telling each other to ‘date rich’. How terrifyingly retro

‘I’m looking for a man in finance” goes the viral TikTok song of the summer. And it doesn’t mean my version – standing in the only bank...

09.06.2024 30

The Guardian

Emma Beddington

Sure, the Taylor Swift millipede is the least of our problems – but what we call wildlife matters

Unsurprisingly, numerous species of animal (including a flightless weevil and a parasitic flatworm) are named after David Attenborough – but were...

03.06.2024 30

The Guardian

Emma Beddington

The new midlife crisis is hot, female and covered in tattoos – where do I sign?

I’m not having a midlife crisis. Any actuary would tell you I’m well over halfway, plus the years 30-40 were one long, undignified, slightly...

02.06.2024 30

The Guardian

Emma Beddington

Teenage boys are becoming high-end fragrance fans. So what’s that ugly smell?

You think teenage boys smell of Lynx Africa, musty trainer and gummy bear vape? In 2024, it might be Tom Ford Neroli Portofino or Acqua di Parma’s...

27.05.2024 50

The Guardian

Emma Beddington

I craved quiet. Then my sons moved out, dog died and hens were killed – and noise now feels necessary

It’s all so quiet. Just the way I like it: my husband is out; it’s pouring, so no one is mowing (the only thing that ever breaches the peace...

26.05.2024 50

The Guardian

Emma Beddington

It’s human v tortoise in the Beddington household. And the tortoises are winning

We have entered the season marked in our household by the battle of wits between human and tortoise. All spring, my husband (dexterous, resourceful,...

20.05.2024 20

The Guardian

Emma Beddington

Free the fridges! Make dishwashers great again! US conservatives have odd priorities

If you’ve ever wished your dishwasher used more water, or found your fridge too cheap to run, help is at hand. US Republicans have their sights set...

19.05.2024 40

The Guardian

Emma Beddington

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