Sometimes the best advice is the most straightforward. This assumption seems to summarize the appeal of TikTok’s favorite armchair psychologist at the moment, Mel Robbins. Her extremely basic tips for tackling life and “getting anything you want” have made her the go-to self-help queen in our increasingly stressful times.

The motivational speaker, author, and podcast host has become an A-lister in the virtual advice landscape thanks to her practical approach to productivity and relationships. Even if you haven’t listened to The Mel Robbins Podcast, or bought one of Robbins’s books, you’ve probably been exposed to her work online. She’s the person getting women on social media to make their beds every morning and high-five themselves in the mirror. Most popular is her viral two-word phrase, “let them.”

The advice is as simple as it sounds: Your teenager wants to dye their hair? Let them. Your spouse is wearing a shirt you don’t like? Let them. You think your co-workers are gossiping about you? Let them.

“Let them” theory has quickly become Robbins’s calling card. It’s the premise of her latest book — The Let Them Theory: A Life-Changing Tool That Millions of People Can’t Stop Talking About, released this past December— and frequently invoked and (sometimes parodied) by her fans on social media.

This catchphrase has won the attention of Oprah, TikTok influencers, and regular people posting about their relationship to the concept online.

Not everyone is buying what she’s selling, however. To some critics, an empire built on obvious and overly generic advice, from a woman without a social work or psychology degree, reads as another self-help scam, and the mantra like a gimmick.

While Robbins has largely managed to evade the cynicism and scandals that emerge when a new self-styled expert blows up online, it’s hard not to notice that her guidance falls into a familiar self-help trap.

A burnt-out lawyer with a knack for public speaking

Like many self-designated experts on life, Robbins has performed a plethora of impressive jobs and leadership roles outside the realm of psychology. After graduating from Boston College Law School in 1994, she worked as a criminal defense attorney for the Legal Aid Society in New York City, and at a large firm in Boston. She’s led life-coaching programs at big corporations. She’s launched (and sold) her own businesses and hosted a call-in radio show. In 2013, she was a legal analyst for CNN during the

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