I didn’t really have time to ponder it in the moment, as I was in the middle of navigating a narrow sidewalk with almost no kerb cut, driving my power wheelchair in Jerusalem. After I’d successfully made it off, I stopped and turned to face the man asking the question.

“What do you mean?” I asked, incredulously.

I have to admit, when the question first registered in my mind, my first emotional response was extreme annoyance. Here we go again, I thought.

“Why do you think someone ‘left me here’? I’m an independent woman”, I continued. “I’m out on my own all the time. I don’t need someone helping me right now”.

He could sense my annoyance and growing anger, backed off pretty quickly, and apologized.

This wasn’t my first rodeo. In fact, I can’t go a day here in Israel without somebody making some comment about my disability.. These comments can range anywhere from ‘Refuah Shelimah’ (speedy recovery) to ‘Do you need help?’ to my personal favourite, “Do you need a caregiver?’ Actually, I think the first example I gave above tops that.

I often tell people that if I had a dollar for every time someone has asked unwanted questions, given unsolicited advice or made a ridiculous assumption about me and my disability, I’d be rich. Extremely rich.

You may be thinking it comes from a good place or people have good intentions. I believe, however, this approach actually stems from the following three things:........

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