When Pesach Became My Reality

Every year before Pesach, we clean out chametz.

On the surface, it’s about getting rid of crumbs—bread, anything leavened, anything that doesn’t belong for that week. But it never really feels like it’s just about crumbs. It’s too thorough for that. Too intentional.

You check pockets, corners, places you normally ignore. You go out of your way to find things you didn’t even realize were there.

And I keep thinking about how similar that feels to the way we hold onto people.

Not in a harsh, “cut everyone off” kind of way. But in the quieter, more honest way—where you start noticing what’s actually there instead of what you’ve been telling yourself is there.

Because sometimes, we don’t question what we’ve gotten used to.

We stay connected out of habit, out of history, out of who someone has always been in our life—without stopping to ask what the relationship actually feels like today.

And like chametz, it’s not always obvious. It’s not always loud. Sometimes it’s small. Subtle. Easy to ignore.

Until you actually go looking.

At a Shabbaton I was at, we did something that I can’t stop thinking about. We were each given a piece of paper and asked to write down something we didn’t want to bring with us into Pesach.

Not just physical things. Patterns. Feelings. Attachments. The quieter things we carry without even realizing.

And then, one by one, we put those papers into a tray. And they were burned.

It was simple. No big speech. Just paper and fire.

But I loved it. Because it made something internal feel real. It forced a kind of honesty you can usually avoid.

You had to decide: what am I actually ready to let go of?

And I think that question became a lot more real for me after making aliyah.

Because distance does something that reflection alone doesn’t.

A seven-hour time difference doesn’t leave much room for convenience. It brings clarity.

If someone is part of your life, it’s because there is intention behind it. It doesn’t just happen passively anymore.

And I started to notice what that looks like.

Who makes the effort.

Who finds a way to stay connected, even when it’s not easy.

And at the same........

© The Times of Israel (Blogs)