Oh joy of joys, the summer hols are here and the children are off for a whole eight weeks – and I have to look after them.

One of the reasons I didn’t mind taking a sabbatical from teaching was that I didn’t have to deal with children on a daily basis, and the irony that my brethren of the blackboard were now cock-a-hoop at the thought of those eight long weeks of freedom was not lost on me.

I saw the staff at the village primary dossing about for the past month and as McGowan, Genghis McCann’s unsavoury friend might say, they ‘needed bate’.

I am being facetious of course – it’s just one of many Tyrone idioms I’ve picked up and think about when I come across annoying people.

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Noel Doran: The Jeffrey Donaldson I saw in south Down

Someone driving too slowly – needs bate. A group of young fellas hollering out of a car........

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