Thank you, Donald Trump. Thank you, Benjamin Netanyahu. Thank you, Jared Kushner. Let’s all pause, shall we, and have a moment of appreciation for these three wise men who have finally brought peace to the Middle East. Blessed are the peacemakers!

And, of course, thank you to the Israeli military which, as a US taxpayer, I have done my part to help fund. To echo Kushner: “Instead of replicating the barbarism of the enemy, [Israel] chose to be exceptional.”

It took exceptional restraint, I’m sure, not to level every single building and destroy all the arable land in Gaza. Instead only about 90% of homes are estimated to be damaged or destroyed. The school system has also been eradicated: according to Unesco-Unosat satellite damage assessments, more than 95% of school buildings require rehabilitation or reconstruction. The United Nations Environment Program (UNEP) has similarly said 97% of tree crops, 95% of shrubs and 82% of annual crops are gone.

It took exceptional humanity, I’m sure, not to kill every single child in Gaza. Instead a mere 20,000 children are dead, probably an underestimate, and an unknown number are rotting under 50m tonnes of debris. The toxic rubble is now home to the biggest cohort of child amputees in the world.

So, again: thank you, thank you, thank you.

What do you reckon? Am I doing this right? Am I grateful enough? Because, judging by the coverage of this supposed “peace deal”, this is the sort of gratitude that is expected of Palestinians right now. We’re expected to be ever so appreciative that the Gaza strip hasn’t been completely nuked or entirely occupied. We’re expected to ignore the increasing number of brutal settler attacks in the West Bank, as if this was an issue completely unrelated to Gaza. Ignore the fact that Israel is still arbitrarily imprisoning Palestinians like Layan Nasir........

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