Illuminated Christmas trees light up a square in central Berlin this December.Lisi Niesner/Reuters

David Moscrop is a contributing columnist for The Globe and Mail.

In the fall of 2020, living alone in my Ottawa apartment, I decided to decorate early for Christmas. It started with a few strings of lights in late October; a few days later, it had progressed to mugs, candles and a Santa hat on a resin velociraptor-skull statue. A scraggly table-sized Christmas tree – my only one – soon sat on the counter of my tiny place, miniature ornaments jutting out at impossible angles.

This year, the home I share with my partner features three trees: a live and chonky eight-footer in our living room, a 7.5-foot artificial tree in my office, and a 7-foot less-than-real-but-near-ideal slim pine in our bedroom. This, for what some might describe as “normal” people, is a lot of Christmas trees. But I had actually argued for five trees this year, wanting one for the basement and another for the awkwardly shaped open landing alongside the staircase that runs to our upper floor. Wouldn’t a tree look splendid right there?

Five trees was my opening gambit; I settled at three. But I was permitted to connect each to a smart plug-system alongside other lights inside and outside that wake each day when I proclaim the words “Turn on........

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