Interest and enjoyment carry approach motivations; we want more of what stirs our interest and enjoyment.

Approach motivations are incompatible with avoid motivations, in which we want less of something or someone.

Whichever we experience the most becomes habituated, the default motivation.

Consider which of the following you experience the most in an average day:

Interest, curiosity, enjoyment, appreciation, compassion, love…

Resentment, anger, disdain, disgust, distraction, anxiety, obsessions, boredom….

The first series of emotions carry approach motivations; we want more of what stirs them. Approach motivations are incompatible with avoid motivations, in which we want less of something or someone. Approach motivations are the opposite of attack motivations, in which we perceive threats, usually to the ego.

Whichever emotion we experience the most intensely and frequently becomes habit, the default emotional state. On autopilot, something unusual must happen to........

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