"Thank you for being so understanding," I sniffled as my therapist handed me a tissue. A second later I added, "I know it's your job," trying to walk back some of the deep gratitude I had expressed to Aaron. I wasn't sure the unconditional acceptance I had felt from him fully counted since he was my therapist.

"It's not just a job, Seth," he said with sincerity, and I knew it was true. The warmth and empathy—even love—that I felt were real.

In the nearly 25 years since that session, I've seen hundreds of people in therapy as a clinical psychologist. Many of my clients have expressed a similar reservation about our relationship—that, in some way, the fact that they're paying for therapy means it's strictly business.

It's not hard to understand this impression. One can easily wonder if their therapist is no more than a "hired gun," paid to dispense care and positive regard.

I can't speak for all therapists, but my own experience both as a psychologist and as a therapy client tell me that........

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