This is Part 4 of our series examining The Anxious Generation. In Part 1, we explored the evidence for the teen "mental health crisis." In Part 2, we reviewed whether social media is actually causing this crisis. In Part 3, we examined school phone bans and found they may be treating symptoms rather than causes.

Now we turn to what many see as the logical next step: banning phones at home.

Jean Twenge, Jonathan Haidt's frequent collaborator, will release a book in September 2025 offering what seems like the perfect solution: clear rules for managing kids' technology use, including "You're in charge," "No social media until 16," and "Give the first smartphone with the driver's license."

These rules appeal to parents because they're concrete and actionable. But what if this control-based approach actually pushes our kids away from us when they need our guidance most?

While I understand the appeal of parental authority, especially when dealing with apps designed to capture our kids' attention, trying to control someone else's behavior is fundamentally difficult, and kids are no exception.

Here's what this looks like in my own family: My husband loves mountain biking and has been encouraging our daughter to ride with him for years. Despite his........

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