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How Should I Be a Man Today?

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wednesday

I get asked a surprising question more often than you'd think—especially by Gen Z guys and teenage boys: “What was it like to grow up in the '70s and '80s?”

No internet. No cell phones. No social media. If you wanted to hang out with someone, you called their landline and hoped they picked up. No answer? Too bad. No answering machine? You had to call back later.

We were latchkey kids, raised on Cap’n Crunch and benign neglect. We drank from the garden hose, roamed the neighborhood on our BMX bikes, and somehow survived without sunscreen—just tanning oil, with mercury fillings chasers.

It wasn’t glamorous, but it built something: independence and the belief that no one was coming to save you.

What most strikes the young men I share this with isn’t just how analog it all was—it’s that we had to figure a lot out on our own. There were no participation trophies. There were, however, consequences to your actions. Some of us got spanked. Still others got hit with belts and paddles. This did instill the fear of retribution if we messed up, but it also reinforced that you were responsible for your actions—even if unfair.

I think the question these young men really want to ask but can’t is: How should I be a man today?

It’s a fair question. The old scripts don’t make much sense anymore. And the new ones? Depending on who you ask, they’re either stuck in the '50s or the manosphere industrial complex, wanting you to buy their rhino horn extract or dominate masculinity mastermind.

Today’s young men face a different world: more........

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