By Gabriela Nordeman Sumarriva, Psy.D., and Robert M. Gordon, Psy.D.

Losing a loved one or a cherished part of yourself can be an overwhelming reality to process. Grief often feels isolating, but sharing our experiences with others lies at the heart of surviving loss. Together, we can foster a sense of community and understanding to honor losses individually and collectively.

This article is a reflection of how I am navigating grief through connection with three individuals after the sudden loss of my father. My hope is that it will help you connect with others and perhaps lighten the weight of loss as you move through it.

My dad died four months ago. He was a pilot who bungee jumped from self-made hot air balloons, a proud black belt and karate instructor, and a Children’s Hospital volunteer clown. He lived on his own terms. He was clever, charming, and relentlessly optimistic.

It is less that he passed but more how that haunts me. He did not want to die, nor was he ready. His stroke was misdiagnosed, and his decline was entirely avoidable.

When the time came, his vigor allowed him to share with his doctor that he did not want to go on. He would never walk or talk like himself again, and this was simply not the life or death he imagined for himself. When the physician left, my dad shared some of his last words with me. He replied “no” when I asked if he was afraid, and “of course” when I asked if he was sad. He died four days later.

Since then, I’ve witnessed our family’s collective loss, each person playing a........

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