menu_open Columnists
We use cookies to provide some features and experiences in QOSHE

More information  .  Close

5 Brutal Signs Someone Is Using You (And What to Do About It)

8 0
27.10.2026

Get unlimited access to everything VICE has to offer.

Turn off all ads on VICE.com

Exclusive New VICE Documentaries

Member Exclusive Features & Columns

Turn off all ads on VICE.com

Exclusive New VICE Documentaries

Member Exclusive Features & Columns

Turn off all ads on VICE.com

Exclusive New VICE Documentaries

Member Exclusive Features & Columns

4 Magazines Delivered to Your Door

5 Brutal Signs Someone Is Using You (And What to Do About It)

A therapist explains how inconsistent affection, one-sided conversations, and a lack of reciprocity can reveal when someone is using you.

Share on X (Opens in new window)X

Share on Facebook (Opens in new window)Facebook

Share using Native toolsShareCopied to clipboard

There’s no worse feeling than being used by those closest to you. And sometimes, it’s difficult to pick up on the red flags. Wondering whether someone in your life is taking advantae of your kindness and support? According to a therapist, here are five signs someone might be using you.

1. They Only Show Up When They Need Something

Whether it’s for money, favors, or mere validation, some people only reach out when they want something from you. Unfortunately, it’s not always easy to tell when that’s the case, especially if you naturally see the good in people.

“How does it feel when they only call you when it is convenient for them or they need something?” asks Debra Feinberg, LCSW, Founder & Couples, Individual & Family Therapist at Maplewood Counseling. “Pay attention to how you feel, always.”

For example, do you feel obligated to help them? Stressed out by their request? Unsupported in return? These cues will help you learn who to trust.

2. Their Energy Is Inconsistent

According to Feinberg, someone........

© Vice