Opinion National Interest PoV 50-Word Edit

ThePrint On Camera Videos In Pictures

Society & Culture Around Town Book Excerpts Vigyapanti The Dating Story

More Judiciary Education YourTurn Work With Us Campus Voice

Opinion National Interest PoV 50-Word Edit

ThePrint On Camera Videos In Pictures

Society & Culture Around Town Book Excerpts Vigyapanti The Dating Story

More Judiciary Education YourTurn Work With Us Campus Voice

Support our Journalism

9th Anniversary: Free Tote & Mug

I can protect Narendra Modi from the cockroaches: Pakistani General X

Out of boredom, I anointed myself the World Peacemaker. Or call me the pacemaker, who will control the heart rhythms of the Trumps, the Netanyahus and the Khameneis of the world.

Wars begin, wars end, but what remains eternal is my uniformed aura. I, as your favourite General X, was here when the United States defeated the Soviet Union — with my help, of course. I was here when the Taliban beat the US — again, with my help. And I am still here as the Iran-US conflict is simmering. Surprised that I am the mediator, though I have no intention or interest in ending any war? In the second innings of my political-military career, mediation is all I believe in.

As I usurp power after power in Pakistan, nothing must remain off-limits now. New legislation passed by my rubber-stamp Parliament helps me reach higher heights. Everything in Pakistan is far too easy and there is no worthy rival. Now your Field Marshal’s dil mannge more. Maybe a stint as your next President? Maybe a place in Argentina’s football team to........

© ThePrint