Tit-whisperer Zack Polanski has officially secured the Green nomination for the Holborn and St Pancras by-election. Despite an internal row over whether the gig should go to a ‘global majority’ candidate, activists ultimately opted for the party’s leader. Polanski/Paulden will now take his travelling circus to the streets of central London.

The dentally challenged Green leader declared:

I am proud and honoured to have been selected for a byelection in the constituency where I have lived and worked for much of the past 20 years. I love........

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