It is my solemn duty to report that, as ever in Trumpworld, the news zone has flooded and we are paddling through a reality-bending time loop.

Last night, the government reapplied tariffs on more than 80 countries, on this occasion using dubious concerns about “forced labour” to justify the charges on Britain, the EU, Australia and elsewhere.

Tonight, the President will attend the rearranged White House Correspondents’ Dinner, three months after the last one was canceled following another assassination attempt. The dinner will be held at the Waldorf Astoria, DC, which used to be the Trump International Hotel. The guest list and security will be tighter this time, and Donald should have a chance to make some good jokes. After returning to Butler, Pennsylvania in October 2024 for a rally at the site where, three months earlier, he’d been shot through the ear, he opened with: “As I was saying” – which was truly funny. Tonight, he’ll almost certainly point out that, even though it’s a lovely venue (he made it so), the event really ought to be held in the........

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