Kids’ sports have changed a lot since I was growing up. I played basketball, and it was pretty low-key. The loudest people were usually the coaches yelling at referees, while parents mostly clapped and cheered. I never had to answer questions about my performance after a game.

Now, parents are far more invested. I understand why. We all want the best for our kids. But somewhere along the way, youth sports stopped being about growth and learning and became about winning at all costs. That mindset affects kids’ confidence, mental health, and sense of self. I see it firsthand because our son does judo. Kids do not need parents coaching them from the sidelines. They need parents supporting them. Shaming, comparing, or delivering life lessons right after they lose is not wisdom. It is emotional clutter.

I often watch parents on the sidelines giving constant instructions: what to do, how to do it, what to watch for. It does not help. I will see kids complete a move, then immediately look to their parents, not their coach, for........

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