What makes good, healthy sex? Carter et al. (2021) found that 81% of people labeled their last sexual encounter as "good." Engaged people were most satisfied with their last sexual encounter, as 97% of them labeled it as "good," while 79% of married people said the same. Nearly 20% of 35-44 year-olds said that their last sexual encounter was "not good."

What constitutes as "good" sex will vary wildly among people, but we should all be working from the same definition when it comes to "healthy" sex.

It doesn’t matter if you’re partnered, co-habilitating, married, divorced, or single. If the sex you are having is unhealthy, you don’t want it.

Functional (or healthy) sex is intercourse that creates a feeling of wholeness and satisfaction. Healthy sex:

Dysfunctional or unhealthy sex is intercourse that leaves you feeling depleted, used, guilty, embarrassed, or disconnected. While it might feel gratifying in the moment, it’s short-lived.

The most obvious example of unhealthy sex is rape. Of course, when one partner hasn’t consented to sex, it’s not possible for it to be healthy. However, we are mistaken if we think that the only type of unhealthy sex is rape.

Consensual sex doesn’t connote healthy sex; it’s more complicated than consent. Check out these dysfunctional sex types and consider if you are having healthy or unhealthy sex:

Obligatory Sex

In my clinical work, I have........

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