If you’re watching the Olympics this year, or have watched in the past, you’ve probably wondered how the top athletes in the world bolster themselves emotionally for high-stress situations, being exposed and visible to millions of viewers in difficult moments, and how they deal with failure and defeat and become resilient.

Dr. Cindra Kamphoff, whose MD-level background in sports psychology, two decades of work with professional and Olympic athletics, and The High Performance Mindset podcast, has developed techniques that are helpful to people inside or outside of the sports arena.

Her mental performance training begins months or even years before the Olympics. She typically supports athletes during the Olympics by phone or Zoom. “After the Olympics, we debrief,” she says. “We evaluate what worked, what didn’t, and how to grow from the experience. Then we reset goals and begin preparing for the next competition. Confidence and mental performance are ongoing processes, not event-specific interventions.”

Many people I know have issues with their lack of confidence when they face a job interview, make public appearances, address audiences, or even go on dates. Dr. Kamphoff identifies ways to build self-confidence that seem to me to be applicable in many situations.

Setting clear goals with a plan to achieve them. Athletes cannot control outcomes like making it to the podium as a winner—but they can control effort, focus, attitude, and execution. When athletes become overly outcome-focused, motivation and confidence decline. Confidence grows when attention is placed on controllables.

Ensuring you’re always prepared. Preparation builds earned confidence and quiets doubt. Top athletes make consistent sacrifices, such as time, energy, and comfort, to ensure they are ready.

Releasing judgment and letting go of past mistakes. High achievers often struggle with perfectionism. The ability to recover quickly from mistakes is one of the strongest predictors of sustained performance. Letting go is a trainable skill.

Knowing who you want to be and acting accordingly. Top athletes have strong self-awareness and understand their strengths, tendencies, and triggers. They use mental tools they’ve learned to enter their peak performance zone.

Celebrating accomplishments. Many athletes just focus on what needs improvement. However, recognizing small wins reinforces progress and strengthens confidence.

Regulating emotional responses to setbacks. Every emotion has information. The best athletes allow emotions without being controlled by them. They learn to see opportunity within adversity.

Getting support from mentors, coaches, and positive influences. Confidence is relational. Trust in coaches and support systems significantly impacts an athlete’s ability to perform under pressure.

Dr. Kamphoff addresses the connection between anxiety, depression, and self-confidence. The latter shapes how we interpret our experience, and when confidence is low, people tend to over-estimate threats, dwell on mistakes, engage in harsh self-criticism, and dwell on mistakes. Those cognitive patterns are also hallmarks of anxiety and depression.

“In our 2025 National Research Study on Confidence, 48% of Gen Z respondents (ages 18–29) reported that they frequently or always feel like they are 'not enough.' That belief—I’m not enough—is not just a confidence issue. It becomes fertile ground for anxiety (anticipating failure, fear of judgment) and depression (withdrawal, hopelessness, rumination),” she explains. “When nearly half of young adults report feeling chronically ‘not enough,’ it reflects a growing ‘Confidence Crisis.’ When confidence erodes, mental health often follows.”

She feels that confidence patterns reflect the feedback young athletes get from parents and coaches, comparisons with peers, early performance experiences, and how mistakes are handled in youth sports.

Athletes who tie their identity exclusively to performance are especially vulnerable. If their confidence is built only on results, it fluctuates dramatically. A bad game becomes a statement about who they are.

And athletes who were praised primarily for talent rather than effort may struggle more when adversity hits.

“But childhood is not destiny,” she says. Confidence is a skill that can be strengthened at any stage with intentional mental training, supportive leadership, and environments that emphasize growth over perfection.”

Like others in the mental health field, she pays particular attention to her clients’ voice or inner dialogue. It's the way the brilliant performers you see interpret events, evaluate themselves, and anticipate the future. It’s the tone they use with themselves before a challenge, after a mistake, during conflict, and when no one else is listening. Like Olympic athletes, if you repeatedly tell yourself, “I always mess up,” or “everyone else is better than I am,” your nervous system reacts accordingly. Your anxiety increases and your performance decreases.

If you learn to shift your inner voice to, “this is uncomfortable, but I can handle it,” or “I don’t have to be perfect to be capable,” your confidence strengthens.

Confidence isn’t built through empty affirmations, but rather through practiced, believable self-talk paired with action. Over time, the voice you rehearse becomes the lens through which you see yourself and your identity.

In relationships and work or other environments, confidence is contagious. On sports teams, when coaches model calm belief and composure, athletes mirror it. When team captains lead with confidence, the rest of the team follows. A confident culture strengthens individual confidence — at work, at home, in your personal life.

As you read this, you may wonder how you can find ongoing encouragement in your life. Dr. Kamphoff’s response may be a bit surprising. “Humans have a natural negativity bias. We are wired to scan for threats. To counteract that, we must be intentional about our inputs.” We can, for example, consume empowering books and podcasts, surround ourselves with people who build us up, limit excessive social media and negative news exposure, and practice daily reflection or meditation. It requires intention and practice.

When I watch Olympians’ painful moments, I generally empathize with them and wonder how they’re trained to deal with failure. I asked the expert what tools she uses to help with this. She answers that she uses Learn, Burn, Return. Learn means what they would do next time. Burn involves letting it go with a phrase or action. And return signifies that you rebuild your confidence and focus on what’s next.

We may never compete in high-level sports, but what helps the elite athletes can be very useful in our own lives.

© Psychology Today