Four Evidence-Based Tools to Develop the Skill of Bravery
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Avoiding fear offers short-term relief but fuels anxiety long-term, a pattern called experiential avoidance.
Acting despite fear builds self-efficacy, the belief that we can handle what comes next.
Growth occurs in the Goldilocks zone between comfort and overwhelm, rooted in developmental research.
The physiological sigh, a breathing technique, can calm the nervous system when fear strikes.
I am on a platform 40 feet in the air. No harness. No equipment of any kind. Just a 200-foot rope that stretches to the ground below.
I am 19 years old, and I am on an obstacle at the Navy SEAL base in Coronado, California. They told us it would be a fun beach day at the Navy SEAL Confidence Course. When we arrived and I looked up at the looming obstacles, my stomach dropped. You’ve got to be kidding me.
This obstacle is called the "Slide for Life." It looked like a zip line, but without any harnesses or equipment.
How do I get down? I have only my body, my hands, and the rope.
In front of my peers, I try to appear calm, but my wobbly knees and shaking hands tell the truth.
I am terrified. Not just of falling. But of failing, in front of everyone.
I feel the hot sun on my face. I am sweating, not sure if it is from the heat or my nerves. Probably both.
I take a deep breath, exhale slowly, and grab the rope.
When my feet hit the ground on the other side, something shifted.
I was scared, but I did it anyway. And I felt proud.
Fear is not the problem
Everyone encounters things that scare them or make them uncomfortable at some point in life: presenting in front of a group, having an uncomfortable conversation, or trying something new that you are unsure will work out.
Experiencing fear is inevitable. But hesitation or avoidance? That’s optional. And bravery? The skill to overcome the fear? It’s trainable.
That’s what I learned on that Navy SEAL base at age 19. It’s also what I studied, and now what I’ve dedicated my career to researching, writing, and speaking about.
Why? Because most people misunderstand fear. The........
