The Importance of Forgiveness

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Unforgiveness can be protective. No one wants to get hurt again when wronged by someone else, and it feels morally just that the wrongdoer should suffer in some way for what they’ve done.

Yet research has shown that holding a grudge can be detrimental to our health and wellbeing. It activates our sympathetic nervous system, putting us into fight-or-flight, increasing anxiety, causing us to lose sleep, and increasing our chances of dying from any cause. The negativity we carry when we refuse to forgive can eat away at us, from the inside out (Why Forgiveness Is Good for Your Health, 2026).

Forgiveness is not about absolution. According to forgiveness scholar Everett Worthington at Virginia Commonwealth University, forgiving someone is about what is going on inside of you. It is defined by catching negative thoughts, emotions, and behaviors toward the person who hurt you, and consciously choosing to replace them with positive thoughts, emotions, and behaviors. It’s about setting down the burden of negativity and choosing to embody positivity – for your own wellbeing.

Author Imbolo Mbue crafted a masterful, layered story of guilt, the complexities of right and wrong, forgiveness, and love in her latest novel Every Story is a Love Story. Mbue’s moving story is universal, deeply human, and a compelling reminder that we all are faced with the difficult task of........

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