When Did We Lose the Art of Containment?
I was standing in the emergency room waiting area a few months ago (don't worry, everything's fine), and I couldn't help but notice the woman next to me live-tweeting her mother's medical crisis. Updates every three minutes. Vitals. Doctor names. Prayer emoji requests. The whole nine yards. And I found myself wondering: When did we collectively decide that every single moment—especially the hard ones—needed an audience?
Welcome to the age of emotional spillage, where containment has become a forgotten superpower.
Here's what I mean by containment: It's not about stuffing your feelings down or pretending everything's peachy when it's not. Think of it more like curation with intention. It’s the ability to hold your emotional experience long enough to decide where it belongs and with whom it should live.
Psychological research backs this up in fascinating ways. A recent study found that anxiety, attention-seeking behavior, and social media addiction all predict higher levels of oversharing online among adolescents. But here's the kicker—the research shows that this constant broadcasting can actually increase our distress rather than relieve it. We think we’re processing our emotions by posting them, but we’re often just performing them instead.
And performance can be exhausting.
Before I serve anyone else their lumps, let me take mine first.
Years ago, when I was facing serious financial stress, I........
