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Expertise helps only when partners keep learning about each other’s uniqueness.

The highest knowledge integrates intuition and intellect.

Romantic flourishing depends on bringing out the best in each other.

Intuitive attitudes often predict marital outcomes better than deliberate ones.

The term “expert” usually carries highly positive connotations—someone exceptionally skilled and knowledgeable. But is such expertise always beneficial in romantic relationships? Should you marry a romantic expert?

“An expert knows how to make love in 748 different ways, but doesn’t know any women.” –Unknown

“An expert knows how to make love in 748 different ways, but doesn’t know any women.” –Unknown

Baruch Spinoza distinguishes three levels of knowledge:

Emotional–intuitive knowledge, based on the senses and imagination—often confused and unreliable.

Intellectual deliberative knowledge, grounded in universal notions—true in principle, yet often incomplete in practice.

Intuitive reasoning, the highest level of knowledge, which integrates emotion and intellect, culminating in what Spinoza calls the “intellectual love of God” (1677).

Expert knowledge belongs to this third level. Although experts often reach conclusions intuitively, their intuition rests on deep, long-term learning. Medical or wine experts develop perceptual sensitivity that enables rapid, nondeliberative judgments. Emotional intelligence functions similarly, blending trained intuition with reflective understanding (Ben-Ze’ev & Kerbs, 2024).

Moral expertise follows the same pattern. Virtuous individuals are more attuned to moral nuances and less tempted by wrongdoing. Their behavior reflects internalized values rather than constant deliberation. Moral education, therefore, should........

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