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What to Do First If You Think Your Spouse Is Cheating, According to a Therapist

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10.09.2026

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What to Do First If You Think Your Spouse Is Cheating, According to a Therapist

Experts say to pay attention to changes, get clear on the facts, and prepare yourself before jumping straight into a confrontation.

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Suspecting your spouse is cheating is a miserable place to live. You don’t know enough to accuse them, but you’ve noticed small things, and it’s hard to pretend to act normal. Their phone has become oddly private. The schedule seems overly booked. There are dots that don’t add up. 

Licensed marriage and family therapist Figs O’Sullivan told Empathi that people can sense trouble well before they can explain it. “In the vast majority of cases, the betrayed partner’s body knew something was wrong long before their conscious mind caught up.”

That gut feeling isn’t proof of an affair. But it is a reason to pay attention to what’s changed instead of spending another week........

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