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The Simplest Way to Fix Your Broken Relationship, According to a Psychologist

A psychologist says staying curious about your partner and asking better questions can help long-term relationships feel connected again.

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Couples in long-term relationships know their partners very well. Almost too well. So well, in fact, that it can feel like there isn’t much left to learn. You know the stories, the habits, the opinions, the little reactions you’ve seen a hundred times. That familiarity is comforting, but it could also be the demise of a happy relationship.

There’s a reason for that. Neuroscientists call it habituation, the brain’s tendency to pay less attention to things it already knows and save its energy for whatever is new. Early in a relationship, another person gives your brain lots to be intrigued about. Their habits are new. Their reactions are new. You’re still figuring out what they mean when they say “I’m fine.”

Years later, most of that mystery is gone. The........

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