Humans are imperfect beings, like any other organism on Earth. We have been striving for better living since the first human stepped on Earth. We have seen how humans have come a long way from the Stone Age to the sophisticated modern times of today. So much so that we get anything we want, in a single click.

Striving for improvement or betterment is a necessary force that drives innovation, discovery, and research, which makes living better for us. It is natural to strive for one’s improvement and minimise one’s imperfections for a better living. However, in today’s digital era, being imperfect is beyond a natural occurrence; it is a shame, a dilemma, a question to your existence.

Changing Perspectives and Social Media

While the world today has touched skies, reached the moon and beyond, and established super-fast communication, it has created new challenges. Mental health issues, global warming, and population rise are some global issues that we are facing today. Today is the time of Generation Z and Gen Alpha, who have grown up with smartphones, online games and online shopping. They are masters of social media. While it seems good and advanced, it has its own dark sides.

Due to overstimulation of the outside world and communication over online platforms, there now exists a peer pressure that is somehow invisible and does not require any physical social settings. There is pressure to show your best selves to the audiences on social platforms. When there is a constant audience of social circles that demand to showcase your best selves, a single flaw becomes a source of worry for you. It may creep into your mind to an extent where it degrades your self-worth and makes you mentally ill.

It is highly concerning today that mental health illnesses are increasing like never before. There is a huge demand for mental health professionals worldwide. A rise has been observed in body dysmorphic disorder (BDD), Muscle Dysmorphia, Social Anxiety Disorder, depression and other anxiety disorders. Many mental health professionals report that more people are complaining about their looks and body features.

Social consent and admiration are important, but not to an extent that makes you question your own self, your identity, your self-worth and so on.

Seeking Perfect Partners

The trend of late marriages in Kashmir has risen significantly. We also hear about the high rates of divorces that take place because of various reasons, which in turn impact the lives of both partners forever. Middlemen report that families have a long list of what a partner for their child should look like, behave like, and so on.

One of my relatives has been seeking a match for their daughter for a few years. They reject guys on silly reasons, and have a well-formed structure of what they are seeking. The girl has turned 32, and it is worrying that they are still delaying marriage.

High divorce rates showcase that couples are not ready to accept the flaws of each other; instead, they see unlimited options in their minds. They are not ready to settle for something that may seem ordinary or natural.

My cousin’s son, who is 11 years old, told me that he does not look good in photos. He says he does not get good likes on social media. The child has his own smartphone and has apps like “home workout” and “Jawline Exercises” in addition to some online games.

I belong to Gen Z and remember my childhood as much better and more fulfilling compared to this. I also grew up with smartphones and video games, but there were no thoughts that would make me conscious about how I looked at that time. At that age, we would laugh at the jokes of our grandmother, and would go on picnics with our uncles. Whatever we did, we were happy!

These trends of high social validity and self-obsession are worrying. These have impacted every individual in some way. Our focus should be towards going back to where it was normal to have a flaw and to be mistaken.

There should be more trends like the “6-7 rule,” a Gen Z philosophy. The ‘6-7’ trend focuses on wanting a partner that is 6 or 7 out of 10 and not a 10/10. This approach takes peace over passion. Captions like “I’d rather have a 7 who shows up than a 10 who makes me cry” are quite famous in this space. It promotes maturity over mediocrity.

Haveed Hilal, Content Writer and Student of Psychology, is alumnus GKSC

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