Emma Grede says caring about money doesn’t make you selfish

The ‘Start with Yourself’ author and Skims cofounder says women need to prioritize themselves, including their money and finances.

[Photo: Jed Cullen/Dave Benett/Getty Images for Emma Grede]

Hello and welcome to Modern CEO! I’m Stephanie Mehta, CEO and chief content officer of Mansueto Ventures. Each week this newsletter explores inclusive approaches to leadership drawn from conversations with executives and entrepreneurs, and from the pages of Inc. and Fast Company. If you received this newsletter from a friend, you can sign up to get it yourself every Monday morning. 

“If you elegantly avoid the subject of money,” says Emma Grede, “money will somehow elegantly avoid you.” 

Grede is most certainly not avoiding the subject of money, ambition, or other topics some women may consider taboo. In her new book, Start With Yourself: A New Vision for Work and Life, the Skims and Good American cofounder aims to dismantle “Old Thoughts” and biases, including the way women talk—or don’t talk—about wealth.

She notes that there are many reasons for the reticence: many women are acculturated to believe that talking about money is impolite, or worse, selfish. “I think sometimes that there is this misconception that if somebody is really focused on the money that they have nothing else that they care about,” she says. “And that’s just not the case.”

Indeed, she says, women should embrace the idea of being well compensated for doing work that they find personally rewarding. “What I want to do is to connect this idea that you can do deeply meaningful and impactful work and still be paid for it,” she says.  

Grede’s perspective reminds me of a piece I wrote about in 2020, encouraging affluent women to earmark some of the money they donate to charity for backing female-founded startups. Women “give a tremendous amount of money, and they have things they believe in,” investor and entrepreneur Kay Koplovitz told me at the time. “But they can also invest in missions and values they hold dear.” 

Growing to give back 

Little seems to have changed since then. Research from HSBC finds that affluent women prioritize saving for retirement over investing at every stage of life. Women in their 20s say planning for children is their top financial priority; caring for aging parents is the No. 1 financial goal for women in their 40s.   

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