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It’s my first day with my new family, and I’m already running the show

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15.08.2026

It’s my first day with my new family, and I’m already running the show

August 15, 2026 — 3:30am

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The diary of a dog, day 1: It’s my first day with my new family. I don’t even know my own name. They seem to call me all manner of things – Sweet Pea, Lovely One, and No Chewing. Actually, I think No Chewing must be my name, as it’s the thing they say to me most often. Maybe they’re Native American.

Meanwhile, the female one oversees the food and does a nice line in chicken pieces. They are served during what she calls a “training session”. Every time I sit down, she gives me a small piece of chicken. By the end of day 1, the chicken is basically raining down on me. I’m running the show. I’m sitting down before she even says “sit”. It’s Pavlov’s dog, except I’m not the dog.

All the same, I wonder if I could impress upon her the need for a better name. No way do I want to make my first appearance at the dog park and be introduced as “Our new puppy, No Chewing”.

Day 2: I’m now hearing the word “Frank” on high rotation. I have a funny feeling it may be my name. What exactly do they want me to be “frank” about? Perhaps that I love........

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