England’s cricketers have just lost the final Test match in Sydney. So the five-match series, a dead rubber ever since the Aussies retained the Ashes over a fortnight ago by winning the first three games, has ended 4-1 in Australia’s favour. This drubbing was entirely predictable: we lost the previous series ‘down under’ 5-0, 4-0 and 4-0 and we never learn.

Our bowlers may be inexperienced but our feckless batsmen have no such excuse

Nevertheless, as Sir Geoffrey Boycott says, ‘There is every chance that the suits at the ECB will… carry on as normal.’ Attempts will be made to explain away and put a positive spin on England’s performance. The heavy defeats in the first two Tests can safely be blamed on a lack of preparation – a ‘one-off’ mistake for which coach Brendan McCullum has already accepted responsibility. Much will be made of our consolation victory in the fourth game – the first time England have won a Test ‘down under’ since 2011. And the sublime batting of 22-year-old Jacob Bethell in the match just finished suggests that we’ve finally found a reliable number 3 so don’t worry:........

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