I’m trying to work out what the new rules are in this country. I think I’m getting there, though any Spectator readers who can assist might help me avoid an appearance at the local magistrates’ court.

On political party funding, this week’s new rules seem clear. You may collect immense amounts of money from trade unions if you are a political party protecting the interests of trade unions. But if you don’t enjoy the largesse of the unions and are a party of business, you are not allowed to receive money from people who have done well in business. Furthermore, the Labour party’s in-house brainiac, Angela Rayner, has made it clear that any person who does give large sums of money to a party that is not her own can be described as a ‘foreign dictator or fascist oligarch’. Which is also apparently not slanderous. Got it.

About what we can wear in public, the present rules are a little less clear. I have never been in the habit of wearing the hijab or the burka, but if I were having a bad hair day and decided to don a head covering, it seems that permission to do so would depend on my political or religious affiliations.

So long as you are on the correct side, you may wear a surgical mask, hoodie or terrorist headscarf

So long as you are on the correct side, you may wear a surgical mask, hoodie or terrorist headscarf

This thought is inspired by an interesting incident in Portsmouth at the weekend. The town was the site of a planned protest against illegal immigration. These have been springing up in recent weeks and the greatest........

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