My colleague was just trying to buy keerai — Tamil for spinach — when Instamart suggested a men’s stroker instead. It appeared between milk and eggs, with the assurance of something that had always belonged there. She was not offended, just mildly impressed by the confidence. “I was genuinely looking for greens,” she said later. “But apparently, the algorithm thought I needed emotional nourishment of another kind.”

When I mentioned this to a friend over drinks, she nodded, unsurprised. “That tracks,” she said. “Sex stuff has become very practical.” It was not framed as a confession or a breakthrough, just useful information, shared the way people now talk about finding a better mattress or switching to oat milk.

Sexual wellness, at least in urban India, has quietly exited the realm of taboo and entered the world of logistics. It is no longer about rebellion or secrecy; it is about optimisation. Something you discuss calmly, test thoughtfully, and occasionally reorder. An errand, really. One that can sit comfortably alongside spinach.

A few days later, another friend sent me a reel she would never post herself — a sexual-wellness educator unveiling a multicoloured dildo with the solemnity of a tech launch. It bent, flexed, suctioned itself onto surfaces, and appeared to promise stamina,........

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