Decades before modern chatbots, research showed that people treated computers as if they were social beings.

AI creates an “as-if” relationship—something that feels social, even when you know it isn’t.

For many people, saying “Thank you” to a chatbot is a way of staying aligned with their own standards.

You open a chat window, type a question, and get a thoughtful reply in seconds. It’s efficient, helpful—and oddly social.

At the end, you hesitate. Do you just close the window? Or do you type “Thank you”?

Many people add the "Thank you." Some even say “Please.” And yet, there’s a quiet discomfort either way. It feels slightly ridiculous to be polite to a machine. But it also feels off not to be.

That small moment captures something important: We don’t just use AI. We relate to it.

Decades before modern chatbots, research showed that people treated computers as if they were social beings. In classic studies, participants were more polite when evaluating a computer on that same computer—as if they didn’t want to hurt its “feelings” (Reeves & Nass, 1996). Even when people knew they were interacting with a machine, they still followed social rules.

This isn’t confusion. It’s how the mind works.

Assuming There Is a Mind There

We naturally respond to anything that seems intentional as if it has a mind behind it. When something uses language, responds to us, and seems to “understand,” we automatically engage our social brain.........

© Psychology Today