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A parent’s aging can make our own distant future vivid and personal.

Ordinary abilities become visible when we remember they are temporary.

A calm, crisis-free morning can be a complete form of happiness.

Mortality awareness can loosen the bond between self-worth and productivity.

Each morning, I look forward to grinding coffee, brewing it in a moka pot, and making breakfast while it brews. After breakfast, I sip the coffee slowly. This is a small moment of contentment, a chance to keep my mind with the taste, warmth, and calm before the workday begins.

Watching my parents grow older changed what I see in that ordinary morning.

Aging had always seemed like a distant fact of life. Watching my own parents grow older made it immediate and personal. In “A Letter for Mom: Making Time Count With Aging Loved Ones,” I have written here about staying present with an aging parent through letters and storytelling. That experience continues to teach me something else: My parents’ aging offers a picture of my possible future.

During visits home, I helped my mom with daily activities she could no longer manage alone. I lifted her from the hammock, steadied her, and took her to the bathroom for a shower. I listened as she described how her body felt. Her vision had worsened, her knees hurt, her back ached, and discomfort moved from one place to another. Aging was no longer an abstract condition.

Helping her........

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