At some point in our lives, most people—and especially young adults struggling with self-efficacy—encounter a state of emotional and intellectual paralysis. This is the existential dilemma; what does it all mean? To figure it out, it helps to read literature, art, history, philosophy, and religion; these are the whetstones for such skill. After all, we are the authors of our lives. Just as writers get blocked, naturally we do, too. The humanities can help us learn how to deconstruct narratives while connecting us to the timelessness of our condition, normalizing it so we can shift our perspective and solve these conundrums for ourselves in ways that resonate with our soul.

Let’s begin with Gonzo journalist Hunter S. Thompson. At age 22, a friend wrote to him to ask what he should do with his life, to which Thompson responded with an eloquent letter (linked below), stating that to ask any man “what to do with his life” would elicit “egomania” from the responder. Thompson humbly recognized what therapists do, too: that the individual is the best expert on themselves. Thompson references Shakespeare’s Hamlet, rephrasing the prince’s to be or not to be as: to float or to swim? Are you looking to take it as it comes, or do you have a desired destination that requires a bit of effort? Neither answer is wrong.

However, it’s important to understand how narratives work. Stories have a beginning, middle, and end, but many events have those components. Stories gain salience from what psychologist Lev Vygotsky defined as “the violation of expectation.” Dramatist David Mamet named a similar dynamic, the element of surprise. Hollywood is littered with predictable stories, but the ones that we love surprise us. This influences real-life stories, too.

Consider attachment theory, the idea that our early relationship with our parents defines how we relate to others as we age. In a securely attached relationship: Mom takes care of me as expected; I feel safe; I grow up to have healthy relationships. Subconsciously, that’s how things are meant to work. Let’s consider the alternative: Mom is a caregiver and supposed to take care of me; mom is absent and cold; my needs........

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