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The 13 "Disses" of Abusive Power, and the Wisdom to Cope

29 0
30.08.2024

Even the first few pages of Robert Greene’s bestselling book The 48 Laws of Power turned my stomach intensely. I had to put it down. Later, I heard a prominent writer recommend the book to get the no-nonsense, nitty-gritty, dirty details on our humanity. The 48 Laws of Power traces many examples of sociopathic, selfish, and factional power throughout history, and it’s not pretty. We are not always pretty.

Any glance at the news, any number of Shakespeare’s plays, or a wide variety of novels, movies, TV shows, or true crime podcasts paint a similar grotesque picture, morbidly fascinating and illuminating to some, sickening to others. I am glad for other and more life-giving looks in the mirror, shining against and in spite of bad behavior. Nurture and compassion have been the bedrock of our survival, but long-term planning for the common good has not, er, been our strongest suit.

As I wrote in my last post, we have quite an ambivalent inheritance, and “society keeps the score.” Indeed society and culture are co-creations. What we put in determines a lot of what we get out, and it is imperative to give better than we get. Everyone has limits, though, on how much they can take, and I don’t advise anyone being a doormat. I do my best to live by the Zen saying “Do not take offense, even when it is offered,” but I’m only human, and I’m very sensitive to offenses delivered by the powerful upon the more vulnerable.

But Big Things, “Big” People, and abusive power do not do well with the Thirteen Disses: Disturbance, Distress, Dissatisfaction (including discontent, disgruntlement, and disenchantment), Disconnection (including dissociation and discombobulation), Disruption, Disappointment, Disagreement, Disobedience, Dysfunction, Distortion, Disdain (including disrespect, disregard, devaluation, and contempt), Disability, and the Disproportionate.

Indeed, Big Things, “Big” People, and abusive power like to deliver the disses to others so they don’t have to deal with them.

How each of us copes with the Thirteen Disses determines the warp and woof, the lift and drag, in our continually co-created individual and collective psyches and cultures.

Abusive power likes to aggressively quell “disturbance.”........

© Psychology Today


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